Masters of Puppetry and other useless things.

Masters of Puppetry and other useless things.


By Hugh Akston



"Here are some [college] degrees that cost you roughly $30,000 in tuition, their much cheaper replacements, and the savings you'd realize:
Degree----------------------------------------------------- Replacement----------------------------------------------------- Savings
Foreign Languages-----------------------------------Language Software-------------------------------------------------$29,721
Philosophy------------------------------------------------Read Socrates-----------------------------------------------------$29,980
Women's Studies---------------------------------------Watch Daytime TV-----------------------------------------------$30,000
Journalism--------------------------------------------------Start a blog--------------------------------------------------------$30,000

...Since none of these degrees help increase your employability, you might as well avoid these majors and do it on your own."

"Worthless: The Young Person's Indispensable Guide to Choosing the Right Major" (Paric Publications), Aaron Clarey.

While almost any Masters degree is going to cost a lot of money some are more marketable than others; on the other hand if learning for learning’s sake is what you are after then it does not matter what program you choose; if you have a special love for a field then you will feel driven to pursue a degree in what you love.


If your goal is to provide for your future, your family, and to make you a productive member of society, then you may want to carefully consider what type of degree you choose. First of all any degree with “Arts” in the title is usually a nonstarter for a good paid position unless you know someone in the industry to give you a break. Any Science degree that does not require math (Political Science, Psychology, Sociology, Ect.) is NOT a science degree. The real science degrees that are titled "Bachelor of Science," almost invariably lie in the "STEM" fields (science, technology, engineering, and mathematics), as well as statistics and accounting, and they involve the mastery of math. 


There are many stories of college graduates who got suckered into spending four years majoring in women's studies--or sociology, anthropology, psychology, or environmental studies--by guidance counselors and proselytizing professors. But the worst are the ones that exploit the minorities, like “Women’s” studies "Hyphenated-American" studies; that means "African-American Studies," "Gay/Bi/Lesbian/Transgender-American Studies," Ones that “teach a person about themselves, gay people do not need classes in how to be Gay: women do not need classes in how to sexually stimulate themselves, they just need to go to the next Frat Party. Yet many black students are being extorted out of tuition money to learn how to be black.


There's the guy who took out $35,000 in student loans to earn a master's degree in puppetry, only to discover that the best job he could get was as a substitute teacher. "What did you expect with a MASTERS in PUPPETRY?" asks Clarey. (Puppetry falls into a category of degrees that Clarey describes as "New Age Crap," bearing such titles as "Peace Studies," "Social Justice," "Holistic Medicine," and "Master's in Outdoor Recreation."

Think I am Joking? Try the University Of Connecticut; their post graduate degree program catalog contains:

The Master of Arts degree generally is considered a preparatory program for an advanced degree at a level between baccalaureate study and a terminal degree in Dramatic Arts. Our department offers the Master of Arts degree in Production, an applied study program with two areas of emphasis: Puppetry and Costuming.

Pursuit of the MA in production (with either the Puppetry or the Costuming emphasis) requires fulfillment of the admission requirements of the Graduate School and three letters of recommendation. All applicants for the MA (which requires a minimum of 30 credits) should consult the Department concerning program availability, personal interview with the program director, and portfolio review. Further information may be obtained by contacting the Department of Dramatic Arts.

Dramatic Arts......................................................... M.A., M.F.A.
Directing (not accepting new students at this time)
Performance/Production (M.A. only -- not accepting new students at this time)
Technical Direction
Theater History and Criticism (M.A. only -- not accepting new students at this time)

In defense of this program I found on one website this critique:


Sure you could argue that a person can create their own puppet theatre and learn as they go. For many puppeteers this option works. However, the University provides professors who are highly regarded puppeteers and internships that provide puppeteers an education that will elevate ones knowledge of puppetry substantially compared to those who decide not to go the Degree route.  Using your argument, one can ask why have degrees in music, literature, art and drama? These courses exist because they play an important part in our society and should be recognized as professional careers.

Actually these degrees exist because they can find some sucker to pay tuition for them, I know what I like in Music I do not need a Collage Professor to teach me how to “appreciate it”. Most of these degree programs came about during the reconstruction period, men like WEB Dubois thought that to make blacks equal to whites, they needed a “Classical” education in the fine arts; after all “Gentlemen” did not need to work. So many Institutes of Higher learning sprang up throughout the country to teach the Illiterate not how to read or work but to play the Piano or look at paintings.


According to Clarey, 68 percent of the worthless degrees awarded at his alma mater, the University of Minnesota, go to women--which might help account for the supposed "wage gap" between the sexes. His advice to females who want to close that gap: Try majoring in a STEM field (only about 20 percent of engineering degrees go to women, so among the other benefits of the major is "that you'll never be without a date,")


The only thing more useless than a degree in Puppetry, is a degree in Political Science: however if you combine the two you get an Obama controller.


God Bless.

Just my thoughts for today.


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Comment by Hugh Akston on October 19, 2012 at 7:22am

My wife studied Cultural Anthropology, it helped greatly in raising children and dealing with their friends.

God bless.

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